Ice-Cream Van

Jack Jefferies always looked forward to nights when his mum and dad would send him to stay at Johnny Coop’s house, and tonight was one of those nights.

            Johnny Coop was Jack’s best friend and his house was huge. Well, not so much huge as it was really tall. In a neighbourhood lined with row upon row of terraced houses, Johnny’s dad had somehow been granted permission to build an absurd extension upward from the roof, meaning the house towered aloft, three times the height of the rest of the street. Consisting of a thin, winding staircase leading up to a penthouse bedroom overlooking the whole town, the build had caused quite a stir in much of the surrounding area. “An eyesore” they said. “A blot on the landscape” said others. Jack thought it was brilliant.

            Johnny’s dad had originally built the looming penthouse as a present for his wife, as a kind of idyllic getaway from the strains of everyday life. However, no sooner would Mrs Coop step foot inside the room, with no walls, just ceiling to floor windows on all four sides, she’d break down in panic at the dizzying height.

            “It’s swaying!” she’d scream, clinging on to the door frame, knees quivering.

            “You get used to that.” offered her husband reassuringly, trying to hide his frustration at a year’s hard work down the drain.

            After numerous attempts at easing Mrs Coop into the room, inch by inch, it was no use, she couldn’t stand it. Or stand up in it.

So from then on, much to Mr Coop’s chagrin, the room overlooking the world became Johnny’s bedroom.

 

            In the backseat of the car on the way over to Johnny’s, Jack wound down the window he was looking out of, in order to release the fog of perfume emanating from his mother. Jack always knew his parents were off on a big night out when he could smell his mum before he could see her.

“Jesus, Love” Jack’s dad complained. “Is there any need for all that?”

“All what?”

“Perfume. It’s getting on the back of my throat!”

“It’ll wear off once we get outside.”

“Let’s hope so, ey Jack?” Jack grinned at his dad’s conspiratorial remarks.

“We don’t want you choking the mayor to death.”

Jack’s mum and dad had recently gotten friendly with the local mayor and his wife through Johnny’s parents, and were excited to be on a night out with the local social climbers. Or, at least, his mum was.

            “I’ll have you know, Brian was very complimentary of my perfume last time, thank you very much.”

            “Oh! ‘Brian’ now, is it? Best mates, are we?”

            “Well we can hardly be calling him ‘Mayor Murphy’, now we’re close acquaintances, can we?”

            “Close acquaintances? We’ve only met him twice!”

            “Three times for me actually, I went to the Traders’ Lunch at the Town Hall, remember.”

            “How could I forget?”

             Jack’s mum gave a half-hearted scowl.  “..and be at your charming best tonight, love. We want the mayor to know you’re a man of ambition.”

            “What’s kissing the mayor’s arse got to do with ambition?”

Jack laughed aloud. It wasn’t often he got to hear his dad swear.

            “You know what I mean.” huffed Mrs Jefferies “And you can stop laughing as well, mister” she warned, frowning in the rear view mirror at Jack.

“Be a good boy for Sindy tonight, Jack. She’s a lovely girl.”

She bloody wasn’t. Sindy was not only the babysitter, but the mayor’s daughter, and not remotely lovely.

“Not bad looking either, ey Jack?”

“Dad!”

“Paul!”

Jack scoffed, embarrassed, and mum, jealous.

            He was right, Sindy was incredibly attractive, though Jack rarely noticed, on account of her brutal personality and generally intimidating nature.

 

            Sindy Murphy was in fourth year at school and was roundly despised by the popular girls of the fifth. This was largely down to the fact she was voted “Fittest Girl in the School” at the annual Christmas party, an accolade never before won by a fourth year. Within the same week, as captain of the fourth year netball team, Sindy had led her team to an unprecedented victory over the fifth year girls, whilst also managing to bust the nose of alpha female Alexi Taylor with a vicious elbow behind the referee’s back, spurting blood all over Sindy’s brand new white pumps, which she wore the next day in a match verses the third years.

            “You know what that is?” she threatened the trembling, third year captain during a less than friendly pre-match handshake, gesturing down to the stained plimsolls, “Alexi Taylor’s blood.” 

            Girls hated her, but were too scared to do anything about it.

            Boys fancied her, but were too scared to do anything about it.

 

Upon arrival at Johnny’s house, Jack was pounding up the stairs before Mrs Coop even had chance to finish her greeting. Round and round the thin winding staircase until there he was, the top of the world. Looking around in open-mouthed wonder at the glowing rows of streetlights below, a luminous map, he picked out his own house as he always did, and watched as the car he was sat in minutes earlier appeared as a toy, driving off into a model town. A glorious sight.

“Alright Jack! Did you see Sindy?” Johnny cut bluntly into the magic.

“Err, no, I just came straight up” replied Jack, in a daze, forgetting he was here to socialise rather than eat up a wondrous landscape with his eyeballs.

“She’s wearing hot-pants, she looks dead fit.”

“Hot-pants? It’s freezing.”

“She got a lift, and she’s wearing a jumper. Who cares?! She’s wearing hot-pants!”

Jack collapsed on to the beanbag laughing, he loved this room and he loved being with Johnny, he couldn’t be happier.

“Hey, my mum got us some ice-cream, wana go get it?”

“Yep.”

“You can have a look at Sindy.”

“Woop woop!”

The pair laughed and joked down the winding staircase, full of excitement for the fun night ahead.

“WILL YOU SHUT UP, I’M ON THE PHONE.”

Sindy Murphy, terrifying as ever, feet up on the couch, fluffy socks, big woolly jumper and the hot pants as advertised. More accurately, they were extremely short jogging shorts, though not likely ones someone would partake in jogging in. With one smooth leg raised with bent knee, Jack’s eyes widened as he saw what was definitely a hefty portion of bum-cheek. He caught her eye and was greeted with such a death-glare he rapidly averted his gaze and hurried to the kitchen where, as soon as they shut the door behind them, Johnny and Jack danced around in hushed celebration at the treat of flesh they’d witnessed.

“Did you see that?” Johnny whispered loudly “You could see her ass!”

“Amazing” the pair laughed, as quietly as they could.

Johnny opened the various freezer drawers in search of the ice-cream.

“It’s in here somewhere.” Pulling out packets of frozen chips and peas he routed further. “She only bought it today, it can’t be that far. She’s not put it in here has she?” Johnny queried, opening the fridge door. She hadn’t.

            Jack glanced through the window of the kitchen door to see Sindy, still chatting on the phone, with a face so beautiful in its natural happiness. The back of the couch hiding her body, there was no chance of any further glimpses. She leant forward out of sight, then leaning back in to view, she held a spoon to her mouth and devoured a huge dollop of chocolate ice-cream.

            “Sindy’s got it!” Jack hissed toward Johnny.

            “Got what?”

            “The ice-cream!”

            Johnny peered through the window as Sindy helped herself to another mouthful.

            “What a bitch.”

            Without thinking, Johnny opened and poked his head around the door.

            “Err, Sindy?”

            Sindy looked round, eyes stern and mouthed “Fuck off” at Johnny, without skipping a beat on her phone-call. Undeterred, Johnny mouthed “Ice-cream” back at her. Sindy, seriously unimpressed, held the phone down to her shoulder so she could enunciate “Fuck. Off.” Clearer than the first time.

            “But my mum said..”

            “What the fuck?! Piss off!” interrupted a near furious Sindy.

            Johnny, realising the futility of his attempts, ducked back into the kitchen.

            “Can you believe that? Cheeky bitch, that shit’s expensive.”

            “How would you know?” Jack laughed.

            Johnny opened his cupboards and pulled out some Monster Munch and big bottle of Coke. This was treat enough for Jack, his own mum only ever bought supermarket own-brand ready salted, and bottles of pop were certainly never a feature on the shopping list. The pair headed upstairs for computer game fun.

            Playing on the computer at Johnny’s, Jack’s eye would always wander out of the huge windows. He insisted Johnny open all the curtains so he could take it all in. Johnny usually kept them closed, as the novelty of the amazing views had not only worn off, but he was also paranoid people were spying on him on such a visible platform. One time, when he’d had a shower, he went back to his room and absent-mindedly threw his towel on the bed to get dressed. Whilst stood naked he heard a variety of hoots and howls coming from a gang of older kids down on the street, laughing raucously as he dived behind his bed, desperately stretching for the towel. In the corridors at school the next day, the same gang walked behind Johnny, teasing him as to whether he’d seen the ‘full moon’ last night. Another time, Johnny had been sat on his bed, watching telly, eating a pizza when he received a text message reading “Save us a slice.” It turned out to be a group of girls from his class, having a sleepover and using him as entertainment, with the help of a pair of binoculars. Suffice to say, it was enough to make Johnny feel somewhat exposed, so he liked to keep three of the four sides of his room covered at all times.

 

            Tired of playing computer games, Jack and Johnny were sat watching a horror film, hoping it would be pretty cool and spooky. It turned out to be pretty stupid and boring. Once again Jack found his eyes wandering to the streets below. A lot quieter now, no cars, no people. He looked around thinking there must be someone out there, wandering home from a night out maybe. Or a cat perhaps, stalking the streets for a mouse. But no. Not a sign of movement, anywhere.

 

BANG BANG BANG BANG

“JESUS CHRIST!”

Jack and Johnny jumped out of their skin at the knock on the bedroom door.

“Fuckinnnng HELL.”

Sindy poked her head in the room.

“What’s up with you pussies?”

Jack and Johnny laughed, embarrassed and relieved, their hearts pounding.

“We’re watching a horror film, it was a really tense bit.”

“Any good?”

“Not really.” Offered Jack, trying in vain to use this rare exchange with Sindy to put across an impression of blasé sophistication.

“Well it made you two shit yourselves.”

“It was a really tense bit!” pleaded Johnny again, unconvincingly.

“Whatever. I’m going to the shop, do you want anything?”

“Some ice-cream?” Johnny joked, riskily. Jack laughed, though hushed himself quickly, fearing the wrath of Sindy.

“Very funny. Knob. It’s in the freezer, there’s loads left.”

“Then, no thanks, I’m alright.”

“Jack? You want anything?”

First of all, Jack was shocked Sindy even knew his name. She’d looked after them a few times but Jack had always been too nervous to say more than two words to her, and besides, Sindy had no interest in speaking to either of them anyway. The fact they were now engaged in casual conversation was somewhat of a momentous occasion for Jack, the fittest girl in school (official) offering to go to the shop for him, he could feel his street cred rising by the second.

“Erm..I’ve got no money.” Jack cursed himself inwardly, for such a lame response.

“It’s alright, I’ll get it. What do you want?”

Jack felt his face hotten at the vision of beauty offering him such attention.

“Erm…can I have a Double-Decker?”

“Did your mum not teach you any manners?”

“Sorry…Please…sorry.” Jack’s face now burning.

“Right, keep an eye on me out the window, in case I get stabbed or something.”

The surprisingly amiable Sindy headed back down the winding staircase, leaving an amused Johnny to tease the dumbstruck womaniser, Jack. Jack told him to shut up, and chucked a pillow at him.

“Are you bothered about watching the end of this?” Johnny asked, of the lame horror film on the tv.

“Nah. It’s a bit rubbish innit.”

            “Hmm” Johnny answered with his head buried in a seemingly bottomless chest, trying to route something out.

            “Ahaa!” he exclaimed, muffled though he was. “Here we are!”

He presented in both hands, a telescope about the size of his leg.

            “Now we can keep an eye on that new girlfriend of yours, and ensure her safety!”

            Jack ignored the sly dig, owing to the ludicrous size of the kit on show.

            “With that thing?! I can see her from here, with my own eyes.”

            “Now now, Jack” Johnny retorted, in a strange voice that could only be assumed to be his idea of some kind of noble army sergeant.

            “You can never be too careful when a damsel’s life is at stake. Who knows what treachery might be lurking round the next darkened corner.”

            Jack shook his head, bemused by Johnny’s comic character. Johnny set up the huge telescope on a tripod and pointed it down on the street.

            “Right, here we go….what have we here? ..Just focus this thing up…Is that her foot?...or some litter?....did she have …a number 20 on the back of her jacket?”

            “That’s the road sign, you idiot. She’s gone in the shop.”

            “Aah yes…with the ‘giveaway’”

            “‘Give Way’ that’s another road sign.”

            Johnny squinted up, confused.

            “You can’t see anything with this.”

            The pair watched the empty street.

            “Ooo she’ll be picking you out the perfect Double Decker.”

            “Shut up.” Jack laughed, quietly loving the fact.

            With the street now in silence, the two boys started to become aware of a faint jingling sound. Johnny pricked his ears up, puzzled.

            “Is that your phone?”

            “I think it’s coming from outside.”

            They clambered to the other side of the room, where the sound seemed to be coming from.

            “Sounds like an ice-cream van.”

            “At this time?”

            The town hall clock, easily visible above the rooftops, showed 12 midnight. An unthinkable time for an ice-cream van to be doing its rounds. Now they were listening with focused intent, the faint jingling became clearer musical chimes.

            “That IS an ice-cream van.”

            “It can’t be.” Johnny dragged over his telescope as Jack saw signs of movement in the distance.

            “Is that it? Just stopped at the bottom of the factory chimney?”

            Johnny focused in.

            “Yes! It IS an ice-cream van. How weird.”

            “What’s it DOING?”

            “God knows. It’s moving again……It’s stopped on the next street!”

            “What a freak! Maybe we should go and see him.”

            “We’ve got ice-cream downstairs.”

            “Not for ice-cream, you idiot. To ask him what he’s doing.”

            “Hmm dunno, seems a bit creepy. He’s miles away anyway.”

            Jack, suddenly scrambled over the bed.

            “We forgot about Sindy!”

            “She’ll be fiiine. Look at you getting protective over your new girlfriend.”

            Jack looked down on the street, eyes scanning urgently. There she was, in the distance, bag of treats in hand, the shop shutters had been yanked down for closing after her exit. She headed back down the deserted street, though she was not alone.

A figure was stalking behind her, close to the wall in the shadows on the other side of the road, walking twice her speed, rapidly closing in on her.

            “Oh my God!” Jack shouted, looking down from on high. “Johnny, there’s a guy, quick!”

            Johnny bounded over the bed.

            “Shit, what’s he doing? He’s probably just walking home.” He reassured himself.

            “He’s looking at her, you can tell!” Jack’s voice held a strong hint of panic.

            Sindy walked, phone in hand, texting away, oblivious to the shady figure behind her.

Suddenly, it slinked from of the shadows out to the middle of the road toward her.

            “SHIIIT!”

            Both boys screamed, shouting and banging their fists on the glass, desperately trying to alert Sindy’s attention, to no avail, the windows were way too thick and they were way up in the sky.

            “Phone the Police!” Jack demanded as Johnny lunged for his phone and dialled 999 with immediacy. The figure just yards behind a clueless Sindy, the boys charged down the spiral stairs faster than they knew possible, grabbing the central beam and swinging their way down, skipping numerous steps at a time. Jack lost his footing toward the bottom and slid down the remaining steps juddering on his backside, forcing his trousers up to his chest. Johnny yelped information down the phone, grasped between cheek and shoulder whilst scurrying through a pompom of keys. The millisecond he got the door open, Jack pushed past and bolted out in to the street.

            “He’s grabbing her!” he screamed.

            “Jack, wait!” Johnny shouted after him, “I don’t think…”

            The closer Jack got, the more he realised Sindy and the figure were actually grabbing each other, in fact more than that, they were passionately getting off with one another, right in the middle of the road. Jack stopped in his tracks.

            “What the?...Who’s?...” He stood in the road looking bewildered, panting heavily and pulling the pants out from his nether regions. Sindy heard the commotion and removed her tongue from the guys mouth for a moment to turn round.

            “What are you doing? You perv.”

            “I thought…we thought..” Jack looked round at Johnny pathetically.

            “You thought you’d come and watch? Here, have this...”

            Jack turned back round to Sindy, only to be thwacked in the face by a flying Yorkie bar.

            “…they didn’t have any Double-Deckers.”

            The shadowy figure, who was now actually quite a handsome guy, if a little rough, laughed a gravelly smoker’s laugh, then proceeded to snog the face off an obliging Sindy.

            Jack picked the Yorkie bar off the floor and shuffled back toward the house, embarrassed and somewhat dumbfounded by what had just happened.

            “Who’s that guy?”

            “Dunno.” Jack shrugged.

            “I told the Police not to bother…she sounded pretty pissed off.”

 

            Back in Johnny’s room, the boys slouched on beanbags, Johnny playing on his Xbox, Jack eating his Yorkie, the latter looking a little sulky. Johnny caught him in the corner of his eye.

            “What’s up with you.”

            “Nothing.” Shrugged Jack.

            “Are you pissed off that Sindy’s got a boyfriend?”

            Jack scoffed “No!”

            “Yeh you are.”

            “I did make a bit of a dick of myself.”

            “So what?”

            “It’s Sindy Murphy! She thinks I’m a total loser now.”

            “I’m not being funny Jack, but she probably thought that anyway.”

            Jack allowed himself the merest of smirks, as Johnny continued.

            “This is Sindy Murphy we’re talking about. You haven’t got a chance with her. Don’t get me wrong, neither have I. She’s after cool, older guys.”

            “What, like that guy? He looked like a right prick.”

            “Exactly. Girls like pricks.”

            “Why?”

            “God knows.”

            Johnny’s TV went blank.

            Then the lights went off.

            “What the hell?”

            “What’s going on?”

            “It’s this room. I’m sure my Dad’s wired it up wrong.” Johnny fumbled around flicking switches on and off, to no avail. The blue bulb of the fish tank barely lit the room for a few moments, then went off too. God knows what the fish made of it. Jack stayed seated, the sudden darkness of the room allowed an expansive view of the town, but as Jack looked around he saw one by one, streets flicking to black. Off, off, off. The big factory chimney disappeared, as did the Town Hall clock, pitch black all around.

            “Jack?” Johnny queried, sounding a little unnerved.

            “Hello.”

            “Can you see anything?”

            “Err..nope.”

“Can you see me?”

“I don’t think so..where are you?”

“I’m waving.”

“Err..I can hear you.”

            “This is freaky.”

            “I bet that prick’s loving this downstairs. Cuddling up with Sindy.”

            “You and Sindy.” Johnny offered witheringly. “What’s going on?”

            “She’s down there, with him playing the hero. That could be us!”

            “With the lights! Not Sindy. Jesus.”

            “I’m just saying..” Jack trailed off, hearing his own stupidity in the darkness.

            The pair stood in silence, taking in the black void surrounding them, looking round at nothingness, when suddenly, in the distance, they heard it again. The soft jingling chimes as before.

            “No way.”

            Johnny and Jack looked round at what they thought might be each other.

            “This guy’s a nutter.”

            “Where is he? Can you see him.”

            “I can’t see anything.”

            Suddenly Jack jolted in shock at an almighty clattering right beside him. Johnny groaned. He’d walked blindly into his telescope and been tackled violently to the floor by the legs of the tripod. Jack asked if he was ok and stretched his arms out tentatively to where the noise came from, cack-handedly trying to help him up. Johnny rubbed his hands around on the carpet, to Jack’s confusion.

            “What are you doing?”

            “My phone’s around here somewhere.”

            He was right, and with that, his face was aglow from the bright screen.

            “Waheyyy!”

            He used the light as a torch and un-mangled the telescope and tripod into a usable, upright position.

            “How are you gonna see out of that? It’s pitch black.”

            “Oh really?” Johnny answered with smugness, “Have you never heard of…Night Vision?”

            “Ah no way, cool.”   

            Johnny scanned the night town in search of the ice-cream van. It was strange suddenly being able to make out the rooftops and chimneys and dustbins and doorbells and streets with dead streetlights in not even moonlight. Jack stood, useless, looking out for no reason with zero vision.

            “Can you see anything?”

            “Hmm…everything but an ice-cream van.”

            “Maybe we imagined it.”

            “What, both of us?”

            They kept still, dead silence, listening.

The jingles, started up again. Johnny quickly scanned the streets with the telescope, blurring the vision by moving too fast. Jack looked out, his eyes now more accustomed to the darkness, caught a hint of movement.

            “There it is!” he alerted Johnny.

            “Whereabouts?”

            “I’m pointing.”

            “I can’t see you.”

            “Shine your phone at me.”

Johnny clicked on his phone and let out a little yelp as Jack was stood a lot closer to him than he’d imagined.

            “Jesus, why are you right next to me?”

            “I can’t see anything! I don’t wanna stand on anything. Look, point it over there.”

            Johnny scanned Jack’s arm to see where he was pointing, then fixed his eye back on the telescope. Jack took the phone from Johnny and shone it on the floor so he could sort out where he could and couldn’t step.

            “It’s him, alright.”

            “He’s definitely a nutter. Who’d buy ice-cream now? One, it’s the middle of the night. Two, it’s not even Summer!”

            “Maybe he doesn’t want to sell ice-cream.” Spoke Johnny, ominously.

            “Then why’s he stopping on every road, like an ice-cream man?”

            “I dunno…maybe he’s looking for someone.”

The pair fell silent at the thought and looked out unnervingly at the ice-cream van doing its rounds in the dead of night.

            Closer than before, the ice-cream van turned into a street perpendicular to the boys’ view. Again the chimes played as if everything were normal. Again the van stopped as if awaiting custom. Though this time was different.

            “Woah, did you see that?” asked Johnny excitedly.

            “What?”

            “He leant forward.”

            “What do you mean?”

            “He leant forward, I saw him, looking out of his front window.”

            “Err..” Jack was a little on edge “..what did he look like?”

            “I couldn’t really tell..I just saw long hair.”

            “Was it not a woman?”

            “I dunno, it kinda looked like a man. And you don’t really get women ice-cream van drivers, do you?”

            “Hmm I guess not.”

            “SHIT!”

            “What?”

The door of the van had swung open.

            “He’s getting out!!” Johnny’s voice was hysterical. Jack got right up to the window and cupped his hands to the glass to focus his view. They waited. And sure enough, a figure climbed slowly out on to the pavement and stood perfectly still for what seemed like forever to the on-looking boys.

            “What’s he doing?” whispered Jack, as if the statue down in the streets might be able to hear him.

            “No idea.” Johnny whispered back.

            “What’s he wearing??”

In the darkness, the figure appeared to be draped in long robes, with lank hair, clinging round its shoulders. Slowly the figure turned its face into view.

            “Shit, it’s definitely a man. He’s got a beard.”

            “What’s he doing??” Jack asked nervously, for about the millionth time.

The man down in the streets now turned his body, facing in the direction of Johnny and Jack.

            “He’s looking at something down this way?” Jack himself, could now make out the man.

            “Jack.”

            “What?”

            “Don’t freak out.” Johnny’s eye was still fixed on the telescope. Jack didn’t speak, he just looked round at Johnny until he spoke.

            “I think he’s looking right at us.”

            “SHIT” Jack fell immediately to the floor and army crawled across the room behind the bed.

            “Johnny! What are you doing?? Get down.”

            “I’m just trying to focus it.”

Jack peered round the bottom of the bed, making nervous noises that couldn’t be described as speech. Johnny persisted, turning the knob to fine tune his sight. A dark blur slowly turned crystal clear to reveal two demonic eyes glaring directly up from the street into the lens.

            “SHIT” Johnny fell immediately to the floor and army crawled across the room, joining Jack behind the bed.

             “What’s he looking at??”

            “Us! He’s going to kill us!” Johnny squealed

            “Don’t be an idiot.” Jack, half reassuring himself. “He probably can’t even see us.” He peered over the bed to assess the situation and saw Johnny’s phone beaming bright. Down from the pitch dark streets it illuminated the cloud high glass box as a beacon.

            “Shit, I left your phone on torch-mode.”

            “What the hell? Go and turn it off.”

            “You do it. You’re nearest.”

            “You left it on.”

Jack clambered over Johnny, now laid flat behind the bed and shuffled slowly across the carpet, belly on the floor keeping low. At once, the door swung open and Sindy walked straight in, stood upright in plain sight. Jack lunged up and rugby tackled her, slamming her to the floor. She screamed.

            “What the fuck are you doing, you wanker?!”

            “Shuuut uuup” Johnny and Jack hissed back at her. “Stay down.” Jack pinned Sindy to the floor, lying on top of her, a proximity he could previously only have dreamed of.

            “Get off me, you knob. What are you doing??”

Johnny now scrambled up, himself.

            “Turn the light off!!”

He desperately fumbled around with the phone.

            “How do I turn it off??”

            “It’s your phone!” snapped Jack, still restraining a squirming Sindy.

            “I never use the torch!”

            “Turn it off!! It’s shining right on you!”

The light beamed in Johnny’s face, illuminating his terror for all to see, including the lone beast down on the street. Jack jumped up and smacked the phone out of Johnny’s quaking hands then shoved it, sliding under the bed into darkness.

            “Jack…” Sindy’s harsh tone hammered out of the darkness.

            “…when I can see you, I’m gonna kick your fucking arse.”

            “Sindy, just shut up for one second.”

            “What the fuck did you say?”

            “I said shut up.” Jack didn’t care who he was talking to anymore, no matter how fit they were.

            “Just. Shut. Up. Then crawl over here and look at this.”

            “Jesus, Jack. When did you grow some balls?” Sindy complied, shuffling across the room.

            The three of them lay on their stomachs, looking down on the street. Johnny and Jack explained the strange presence of the ice-cream van, the man still stood in the same place but no longer looking directly at them, from what they could tell.

            “What is he? Some kind of paedo?”

            “That’d explain the ice-cream van.”

            “Lure them out.”

            “We should phone the Police?”

            “And say what? There’s an ice-cream man driving around? So what?”

            “Tell em there’s a paedo on the loose.”

            “We don’t know he’s a paedo. Plus, we’ve already phoned them once.”

            “What??”

            “They’ll think we’re pissing around.”

            “When have you phoned the Police??”

            “We thought that guy was attacking you.”

            “What guy?”

            “The guy you were getting off with.”

            “Shane??”

            “Where is he, anyway?”

            “He’s gone.”

“How come?”

“Boys, when you’re older, be a gentleman. Girls like a gentleman.”

“Was he not a gentleman?”

“He’s a prick.”

            “He looked like a prick.”

            “Oh really? Jack getting jealous?”

            “No.”

            “Yeh you are. Do you like me Jack?”

            “Shut up. No”

            “Why are you blushing?”

            “I’m not!”

            “Yeh you are. Johnny, Jack’s blushing.”

            “How can you even tell? It’s pitch black.”

            “I can feel the heat coming off you, Jack.”

            “Guys, shut up. Look!” Johnny hissed, tired of the horseplay. Jack, relieved for the interruption, was blushing and feared his burning face actually was emanating heat.

            “He’s getting back in his van.” Johnny continued.

            “Shit, he’s coming to kill us!” Sindy added.

            Again the van started up, and again the chimes played.

            “He’s totally seen us.” Sindy wasn’t quite living up to her hard as nails reputation. Johnny felt around for his telescope and begun tracking the van. Sindy wanted second by second updates.

            “Is he coming this way? He’s coming this way isn’t he. Shit, he’s coming this way.”

            “Give me a minute, he’s only just set off.”

            “Which way?”

            “Err…this way.”

            “Fuck, he’s going to kill us. We’re going to get killed by a paedophile.”

            The van approached slowly in their direction, tingling chimes in the dark, until a few blocks later it turned into another street and pulled over as always. Chimes stopped. The three waited in silence.

            Johnny scanned up and down the street. He reached the far end and saw a small boy emerge from a driveway. Johnny gasped.

            “Someone’s come out.”

Jack and Sindy gasped.

            “Who is it?”

Johnny tried to focus the telescope further until a small, round child appeared clear in his lens.

            “Oh my God, Sammy Weathers.”

Jack gasped again. “What!”

            “Who’s Sammy Weathers?” Sindy asked.

            “Small, fat kid in the year below us.”

            “What’s the man doing?”

Johnny scanned back over to the van, it was still, no emerging figure, no sign of activity. He looked back at Sammy Weathers, waddling down toward the ice-cream van in his pyjamas.

            “What are you doing, Sammy?” Johnny whispered.

            “Turn round Sammy, you idiot.” Jack pleaded in vain.

Sammy continued slowly down his street, the van stayed motionless.

            “Turn around Sammy!” Johnny spoke louder, more agitated. Sindy jumped to her feet and banged her fists on the glass.

            “Sammy you fat fuck, turn around!!”

Jack and Johnny jumped up and joined her, all three pounding on the glass, screaming for the boy in his pyjamas to stop walking.

Again, Sammy was way too far down in the neighbourhood to hear. As Sammy Weathers reached the van and disappeared behind it, the three hushed and waited.

And waited.

No movement.

Sindy broke the silence with a whisper.

            “What’s going on?”

Jack stayed quiet, eyes wide on the motionless van.

            “Maybe he’s….buying an ice-cream?” Johnny offered.

They waited again, all three stood in line, as close as they could to the glass, cupping their hands against it for better vision, eyes fixed on the ice-cream van, awaiting the re-emergence of Sammy Weathers.

            Finally a rumble.

The engine started up and the van roared into action. The three at the window watched for signs of Sammy on the street. It didn’t come. The van screeched away and left the street empty.

            “Where’s he gone?”

            “He’s in the van!”

            “He’s got him!”

            “The paedo’s got him!”

The ice-cream van stormed round the neighbourhood, no more chimes but probably even louder with the growling engine and screaming tires round corners, heading closer and closer to Johnny’s house.

            “We need to stop it.” Jack’s voice full of urgency.

            “Are you insane?”

            “How?”

            Jack clambered over to the door

            “Come on! Quick!”

The others didn’t have chance to question before chasing after him.

            “I’m phoning the Police!” Sindy shouted as the three thundered down the stairs. Johnny was speedy with the lock this time and again Jack legged it out into the road without a thought, the street lights glared back into light, blinding everyone’s accustomed eyes, the ice-cream van immediately upon them shrieked in desperation to swerve the boy but instead sent him flying across the street. Johnny watched as his best friend thwacked into a tree and crumpled into a lifeless mess on the floor. The van crunched into a lamppost and fizzled out of action.

Upon sight of the carnage, Sindy’s voice on the phone transformed into an incoherent yelp. Johnny wandered dumbstruck, avoiding fallen lampposts and rolling wheel trims, over to the heap of bones that used to be his friend. He heard crying. Sammy Weathers climbed out of the van bawling his eyes out. The hairy beast followed. An awful looking man in dressing gown, scruffy tracksuit bottoms and slippers, hair and beard unwashed in months, perhaps years.

            “COME HERE, SAMMY” he roared. “COME HERE”

Sammy wailed and whimpered “I want to go home.”

            “I’M TAKING YOU HOME, SAMMY. COME HERE.”

With that, a shrieking banshee of a woman came hurtling down the road, also in dressing gown, hers red silk, and slippers, fluffy, screaming her throat raw.

            “BE GONE, DEVIL! BE GONE, DEVIL!”

Sindy looked around flabbergasted.

            “What the fuck?”

Sammy sprinted toward her.

            “MUMMY”

            “BE GONE, DEVIL! BE GONE!”

The hairy oaf tried and failed to grab at Sammy, too slow and cumbersome in his movements.

            “I told him I didn’t want to go, mummy.” Sammy cried.

The hairy beast roared again.

            “I TOLD YOU I’D FIND YOU, SHIRLEY. I SAID I’D FIND YOU”

            “PISS OFF, FRANK. HELL AWAITS THE DEVIL. AND HIS SODDING VAN.”

Sindy watched in open-mouthed awe, wondering which of the two robed parents seemed the most unhinged.

Finally, flashing blue lights approached the scene. Hairy Frank was soon in handcuffs. Poor Sammy, wrapped in tin foil looked like a pudding.

 

Away, by the tree, the scene was quieter.

 

Bodies in uniform surrounded a nest of contorted limbs.

Johnny cried his heart out on to the pavement.

Sindy, solemn, followed a stretcher, carried to the body.

 

Streetlights and stars

Are all I can see.

And the most beautiful face

Looking over me.

I don’t think it’s an angel

But it sure looks like one.

 

“Jack?”